The Summer That No One Expected

We’re five months in.  In many ways, it’s hard to believe that it’s been 5 months since the world seemed to shut its doors and our ways of life changed. Today we went to church—the second time our church has met in person in these past five months—wearing face masks, sitting in chairs grouped by families, outdoors, avoiding handshakes, hugs, and other physical conduct.  But we were together!

Titus is the only one of our kids who actually asks to wear a mask!

Still smiling behind her mask.

Our first mail from the US in five months! And, it contained birthday money!

    Life in community has come to mean screens, choosing that community carefully and then trying not to step out of that community.  In many ways, community has shrunk, narrowed, been reduced to those within our households; in our case—three little struggling humans and two struggling big humans who have spent a LOT of time together. Now that our community has grown again with many families returning to our neighborhood, it leaves me missing even more what we had before; the ease of dropping by, having kids over for playdates, being in each others’ lives not just over texts and whatsapp, but in person. 

    Yet looking back, God has been so good.  Many of the fears and unknowns that we faced at the beginning of this journey have not been realized.  The unrest we feared in Indonesia has not come about.  Food has been readily available, we didn’t have to evacuate at any time, and our community has been protected from sickness. 

            Our summer did not look the way we expected, but it wasn’t all bad.  It was filled with lots of time riding bikes around our neighborhood, putting up the kiddy pool in our backyard, playing on the school playground, swimming on the weekends, and of course, skype and facetime calls with friends and family back home.  The summer season includes four out of five members of our family’s birthdays.  While birthdays are usually fun, it was extra nice to have something to celebrate and a reason to rejoice in the midst of a season that often felt mundane.

Happy 4th birthday to Elias!

Happy birthday to Daddy!

Online church.

Lots of time at the school playground.

A Manadonese birthday cake from some of my former students and friends.  A sweet surprise!

Happy 6th birthday to Lydia!

Drive by Kindergarten graduation for Lydia.

We spent lots of time at the school pool and eating pizza.

An unexpected highlight was having our good friend Gosia, adopted family member and auntie to our kids, come and visit with us for a few days.  Because of her socially distanced living situation, we felt very comfortable having her in our home.  She is the only person we’ve had in our home (besides the occasional repair man) over the past five months! We ate a lot of western food that typically we’d eat during our American summer sojourn—pizza, hamburgers, cinnamon rolls, bacon—and we played in the house and at the SPH playground and pool, of course.  It was so great to have another person who knew us so well and loves our kids so much spend time with us.  I especially enjoyed having another adult around while Jeff was working.

            Another special treat was a week spent at the beach in Sukabumi, which is on the south coast of Java.  It is a 176 km, four hour plus drive away from where we live.  Thanks to most of Jakarta still being on lockdown, we were able to speed through downtown Jakarta and get to the end of the toll-road in only about an hour and a half.  But the last 76 km made up most of the trip, and if that tells you anything, it should be that those roads were horrific. 

Our fearless driver!

This picture doesn't do justice to the roads.

    In planning for the trip I had not accounted for motion sickness.  About an hour into the twisty, bumpy, up and down roads weaving through the mountains, we had our first call from the back seat of our car—Lydia feeling sick to her stomach.  We moved her up to the front, turned the AC on full blast and told her to look straight out the window.  Another hour in and Elias was also looking pale faced and complaining of a tummy ache.  I had to be careful to keep my eyes glued on the road so I wouldn’t succumb to the jerking of the car myself.  We had just bought a new (to us) car and discovered that while the space was great, it didn’t have the best “oomph” for getting up the hills.  So Jeff would lay on the gas to try to propel us up a hill as best he could, and then speed down the other side, twisting and turning as he went to try to keep the momentum for the next upward climb.  Meanwhile, the roads were lined with stores, homes, and pedestrians. As Jeff said, it was like a real-life version of Mario Cart, that almost would’ve been fun if it hadn’t involved real live people—both inside and outside the car. 

Thankfully there were no roads on the edge of steep drop-offs and no rain, so we felt safe.  At one point, the road in front of us seemed to plunge directly downward.  You came to the edge of the hill and couldn’t see the road, but it was there if you drove on by faith! Thankfully, in all of this, we were caravanning with our friends who were leading the way, so we plunged on over the roads that they had to navigate beforehand, following their lead on avoiding potholes and slowing for curves or straggling villagers.

Jeff and I breathed a sigh of relief when we turned a corner and there, stretching out below us visible through the trees at the bottom of the mountain, was the coast.  We meandered down to the coastline and joined a bigger road that was full of traffic but at least it took us out of most of the mountains.  We kept looking at the google maps navigator, only to see the kilometers creeping by.  Finally, we made it to our destination: Ocean Queen Resort.

We had booked a bungalow on the ocean front next to our friends, and immediately we ran straight down to look at the ocean which you could see from the front porch of the bungalow.  I was disappointed that the beach was still pretty trashy.  I’d hoped that since we’d come so far it would be a little cleaner than the notorious beaches near Jakarta.  But by the end of the week, for better or worse, I hardly noticed the trash anymore.  The ocean crashed almost right on the beach, so it was too rough for our kids to get in very far.  Immediately when Elias raced up to the ocean he was knocked down, and we were told to watch out for dangerous undertow and currents, especially on the last few days of our trip. 

One of the highlights was the fresh seafood that one of the resort staff barbecued for us on the grill in front of our bungalow four of the six nights we were there.  I’ve never had such tasty fish, prawn, chicken, and crab.

We spent our days in our swimsuits, either at the pool, playing in the sand, or exploring the beach.  We trekked to two other beaches where the shore was wider and the waves crashed farther out, so we were all able to get into the ocean. 

Lydia loved the ocean and wanted to be in it all the time.  Elias was mildly terrified, at least until the last day when Jeff was able to take him out at one of the calmer beaches and he gradually got used to it. He mostly stuck to the sand.  Titus also loved the ocean and just wanted to plunge in and let go of our hands, heedless of the fact that he would get knocked over and a spray of ocean water in his face. 

Even though we live so close to the ocean, we hadn’t been to the ocean in three years, so none of our kids remembered it.  The trip was a great introduction to them, and we wouldn’t have gotten to go if we’d gone to America.

Lydia was thrilled to celebrate her birthday at the beach with friends.  We’d brought ingredients for s’mores, so the night of her birthday we all made smores together at the grill in front of our bungalow.  The friends we were with went out of their way to help her feel special by giving her little gifts.

The highlight for me was waking up every morning to the sound of the waves crashing on the beach, going out on the porch of our bungalow with Titus in the cool gray light of the morning before the sun rose, and seeing the ocean, sky, and mountains surrounding us.  It was wonderful to have cool mornings and evenings where I even wanted a sweatshirt, and to eat our meals looking at the ocean and hearing its power.  Jeff and I both got to do some reading and have downtime during Titus’ naps.  It was our first vacation without any extended family, but it was surprisingly smooth and restful, even with three little kids.

Fresh grilled seafood for dinner!

It was a beautiful area, even if the beach was a bit trashy.

S'mores for Lydia's birthday!

Birthday breakfast on our front porch.

A good place to eat snacks right in front of our bungalow.

Breakfasts and more snacks on the front porch.

We wrapped up the week and headed back home, ready to sleep in our own beds but not ready to leave the beauty of the beach behind us.

We ended the summer with another small trip to visit our friend Gosia for a couple of days at her new home.  Then, it was back to Karawaci, back into our bubble, where we’ll probably remain for a while, especially now that school has started again. 

A visit with Gosia in Cikarang.

The bubble isn’t bad.  We usually feel like we’re in a bit of a bubble here, it’s just that the bubble has gotten a little smaller and the edges are a little firmer.  We’re working on finding new routines and new outlets now that school has started online for Lydia, and will start online for Elias this coming week. But again, God has provided a very wonderful bubble for us during a time that is uncertain to say the least.  We rejoice in his provision over these past five months, and we look forward in faith, knowing that in the midst of many changes, he is teaching us flexibility, faithfulness, contentment (that’s a hard one), and trust.  The five struggling humans in our home are also growing in the midst of the struggle, and we hope to grow deeper as some of us grow taller (and some of us continue to grow rounder) over the months and year ahead.

Christmas 2019 in Laos

For a brief trip down memory lane, I’m going back to the time when we could still travel freely.  I wrote most of this before covid struck, and then finishing the post took the backburner until now. I’m so thankful we were able to take this trip before the world was turned upside down.  So here I go, back to Christmas, 2019, already four and a half months ago.  And side note, this post is long.  It’s mostly for my sake.  I want to remember this trip, but I don’t expect that you will care about all these details!

For weeks leading up to our trip I was worried.  Surely something was going to happen to keep this trip from taking place! First, Elias was sick (well, you can travel with a sick kid anyway, I thought).  He got better. Then a new fear struck me. Chicken pox had hit our community, and while our kids had been vaccinated, it’s still possible to get the sickness.  Two days before we were going to leave I saw two pink dots on Lydia’s face, behind her ear and on her cheek.  Was it the beginning of the chickenpox? I brought her to the doctor since Titus had to go for a flu shot anyway.  True to form here—the doctor wasn’t sure (saying it was too early to tell) but she prescribed me the meds, “just in case.” “After all, you don’t want to be stuck in quarantine while you’re traveling,” the doctor said. (Looking back on that sentence I wrote a couple of months ago makes me laugh.  Now I can’t imagine traveling WITHOUT facing at least two weeks of quarantine!)  I took that just in case medicine and decided Lydia would wear her hair down on the airplane, just in case. 

            With each step of the journey that took us closer to Laos, I was more relieved.  This was a trip I had dreamed about ever since leaving Vientiane eight and a half years ago.  Literally, I dreamed about it many nights; I could visualize the roads around the city, was always trying to meet up with some friend and couldn’t quite make it.  It always had that feeling where you hope it’s not real, yet at the same time hope it is.  I longed for that place, and I knew someday I would be back. 

            Finally, the time had come.  Jeff and I had talked about it and decided that despite the expense involved, we were going to go to Laos for Christmas.  Titus was still free to fly, we had the opportunity for the first time since we’d been in Indonesia—no visitors were coming and we didn’t need to fly back to the states for any reason.  To make it a doubly impactful trip, we also flew through Bangkok so we could visit Philip and see his life.

Titus was not sure how he felt about being stuck in the car seat.

On the way to the airport.

The crazy flight begins--passing Titus back and forth over the aisle.

We made it to Phil's apartment in Bangkok! And promptly took it by storm. 

Lyd was my explorer buddy as we went with Phil on a small adventure. 

A huge Mickey Mouse Christmas display outside one of the high end malls in Bangkok.

           Why did I doubt God’s goodness, that he would tease me with a fulfillment of many years of dreaming, dangling something good in front of me, only to snatch it away in the last minute?  Because that happens sometimes in life.  That’s what it feels like when we’re faced with disappointments much more crushing than a missed trip.  So then, why did I doubt that whatever happened, it would be for my best? That a good God has my best at heart, no matter how much I may not like that good at the time? These were the thoughts I struggled with leading up to our departure.  Yet, As the reality unfolded, it contradicted my fears and showed me his goodness each step of the way.  And now, in the midst of the pandemic I face a totally different side of God’s goodness.  There have been cancellations and disappointments, and I am learning to trust him and see his provision despite and in the midst of these things.

            Traveling is exciting enough, traveling with kids adds a new level of thrill.  The thrill of counting pieces of luggage and children to make sure you remembered everything as you go through security and immigration.  The thrill of trying to get your 14 month old child to sit in your lap during take-off and landing, even though he’s just learned how to walk.  The thrill of filling out 5 different visa on arrival applications in the airplane—it took almost the same length of time as the plane ride itself. 

Whether she liked it or not, Lyd was quite a celebrity in the Bangkok airport.  We tried to get her to practice her Mandarin with these Chinese girls who were very friendly, but she wasn't ready to.

            Finally, we were there.  We’d touched down in Vientiane. I couldn’t believe it.  Everything was the same and yet so different.  I was different.  My life was completely different than it was eight and a half years ago.  Then, I was single, a student, with so much less responsibility and commitments.  Now, I was a mom.  A mom trying to balance caring for my kids while at the same time reliving memories and reconnecting with a place that was so special to me.  I wasn’t sure how it was going to go, but I was determined to enjoy the gift of that time, and try to hold my expectations loosely.

            Walking out the doors of immigration into the airport I was greeted by a familiar face, the face that had dropped me off at those doors eight and a half years ago, my host mom.  I doubt she had the same feelings that I had, but I was so happy to see her and couldn’t believe it.  There were so many things I wanted to do, people to see, places to visit, food to eat, and I couldn’t wait to get started.  I knew the week would fly by and I didn’t want to miss a minute of it! She dropped us off at our guesthouse, and we settled in. 

We made it!

            We’d forgotten how different Vientiane is from Jakarta.  Jakarta is one of the largest cities in the world.  It is bustling, cosmopolitan, and there are high rises and malls everywhere.  Vientiane is small and intimate in comparison.  Everything is closer.  The rich are closer to the poor, both in the amount of money that they make, and in proximity.  You don’t see drivers, nannies, and helpers following behind everyone.  You don’t see a cellphone in hand at all times.   Taxis, grab drivers, and go-cars are nowhere to be found.  The mode of transportation if you don’t have your own vehicle is through Tuk-tuk or Songtaews.  Tuk-tuk drivers are middle aged or older men who spend their days swinging from hammocks in the back of their vehicles, waiting for customers to come.  There’s no high tech usage of google maps to find where you’re going.  You call them by standing by the side of the road and waiting for them to drive by.  Then, you’re transported in the open air, wind blowing in your face, hair streaming everywhere.  The kids loved it.  No car seats, seatbelts, and probably a high speed of 30 km/h.

First tuk tuk ride

            I forgot how much we would be outdoors and how dirty you always feel.  Feet covered with a layer of dust, face dusty, sweat trickling down your back.  That is the norm during dry season when it’s hot in Vientiane.  Washing your face and feet at night will leave streams of brown dirt trickling down the drain of the tub. Better to just jump in the shower.

            And, what we’d forgotten about to our detriment…no credit card usage.  I’d spent a lot of time planning the trip, but not that important detail.  We hadn’t exchanged any money at the airport, and here we were on Saturday night, needing to buy dinner for 3 hungry children (not to mention ourselves) without any money to do so.  Thankfully, our former teammate, Linda, had met up with us for an early dinner, and so we borrowed her Lao Kip—but just what we didn’t want to do—be a burden to all of our friends during our entire visit.  It was a slightly panicky feeling to realize that we might not be able to access our money. 

First reunion at our favorite Vientiane Cafe with our former teammate, Linda. Our time together was too short!

            After Linda dropped us back off at our guesthouse, we went online and unlocked our ATM cards.  Jeff’s had just expired.  Mine was renewed but I could not remember my pin. I hadn’t used it since the summer and I had no idea where the pin number was saved.  In desperation, after the kids were in bed, I walked to the ATM and stood in front of it, going through combinations of numbers in my head.  Finally, in a flash, it came to me.  I nervously punched in the numbers, and….money! And relief!  God’s goodness. 

            Our adventures continued the next day. After a lovely breakfast at our guesthouse—one of the highlights of our trip—we were ready to strike out on our first adventure to the local Lao church.  This was the church I had attended almost every Sunday morning while living in Vientiane.  We all dressed up and loaded into the tuk-tuk for our drive there.  It was our first drive down the main road where we could see Patuxai rising up as our one steady and remembered landmark. 

We really enjoyed the delicious guesthouse breakfasts.

            Everything about life in Vientiane was foggy.  My Lao language was incredibly foggy.  My sense of direction and remembering where things were was also incredibly foggy.  Yet as we traveled down roads that had once been so familiar everything gradually started to fall into place again.  When people spoke Lao to me, I found that I could still understand, and then I could use those words to communicate back.  But until people spoke to me, I couldn’t recall the Lao words I wanted to use to communicate, and instead Bahasa wanted to come out.  By the end of the week, my Lao was strong enough that I could communicate enough and even converse with some Lao friends who didn’t speak any English.  It was still broken, but Lao is such a lovely language, and Lao people are so gracious—they made it easy for me to try, and helped me out by supplying words that I’d forgotten.  It was such a good feeling for it to come back so much (not completely by any means) in such a short time.  I’d forgotten how many chances I had to use it every day when I lived in Laos.  All that usage really solidified the pathways in my brain to a great extent than I’d realized.  It made me again see the differences with my life here in Indonesia, where I only need to use Bahasa occasionally, and mostly in the home with my helper. 

            Our trip to church was punctuated by, “Oh, I remember that place, that’s where…” and “Look at that guys, that’s where mommy and daddy got engaged!” Or, “That’s where daddy ate his first meal in Laos.” Finally we were bumping down the final road to the church and it rose up, unchanged before me.  Dusty parking lot filled with cars.  People crammed into every corner of the sanctuary and the courtyard.  Hot, dusty, but filled with people praising God in Lao.  The familiar liturgy from so long ago came back.  The energetic praise songs broadcasted on the powerpoint.  The long pastoral prayer where the pastor starts praying on a certain topic and then everyone in the congregation murmurs along as everyone prays in their pew.  The song, “I Surrendar All,” during the offering.  The special music done by the youth choir.  All of it, so similar to the years gone by, even some of the greeters with faces that were so familiar.  The translator that had sat in the English speaking pew in the back, translating the service into English, still there!  And yet, so many people no longer there, or that I didn’t know anymore. 

Church in another language.  

            Of course, my children were not having the same thrilling joy of participating in worship in that church that I was having.  They were in a huge crowd of people they didn’t know, they couldn’t understand what was happening, they were hot, they were hungry, and they were bored.  When the sermon started, Jeff & I knew that they weren’t going to last.   I tried taking them over to the children’s church.  They wouldn’t go in the door.  It was a huge crowd of kids they didn’t know, in a hot room.  Finally, some of the kid’s program leaders came out and tried to engage with them, and the kids went in with me to watch a Bible story video in Thai.  Once that was done, they again wanted to leave with complaints of hunger, so we went back out.  The romanticism and nostalgia faded as we tried to find some food to hold them over till the service was done.  But the service seemed to have a long ways to go.  No tuk-tuks came down that small road.  The ice cream cart that had been parked in front of the church when we first arrived was nowhere to be found.  Finally, after looking in the shop across the street for some snacks the kids would eat and being unsuccessful, we decided we couldn’t just wait it out in the heat with sweat trickling down our backs any longer.  I decided I would hike out to the main road and try to flag down a tuk-tuk to come get us. 

            I forgot how long and dusty that road was.  I finally made it to the entrance and tried to use my Lao to ask where to find a tuk-tuk.  At that point, it was still extremely rusty since it was our first full day in Laos.  In the meantime, they were selling bing ba (grilled fish) and kao niaow (sticky rice) at the shop near the corner of the street, one of my favorite Lao foods.  So I bought some of that for us to eat.  After walking up and down the main street for a while and despairing of seeing any tuk-tuks, finally, I saw one sputtering down the street.  It was small, and there was already one person inside.  But I flagged it down, and it was willing to pick me up and drive back to pick up the family and take us to the main marketplace where we could get a tuk-tuk to our guesthouse.  I was relieved, hot, and thirsty, but we made it back to the church just in time for the service to end, and picked up the rest of the family.  I’d hoped to be able to stay after the service to talk with my host family and eat lunch with the church, but we figured the kids probably wouldn’t be able to handle that, so we headed back to our guesthouse via Talaat Sao, the main market.  Our tuk-tuk driver handed us off to another driver, and we knew enough directional words still to get him back to our guesthouse entrance. 

Trying sticky rice and bing ba for the first time. The sticky rice was a hit!

            From there, we ate our fish and rice and I saw messages from my former Lao roommates.  We were having a reunion gathering at sister Jiam’s house. I had lived with Jiam and Weung for two of my years in Laos.  We had shared meals and life together, and they were two of the people I was most looking forward to visiting during our trip. Another good friend, Vath, was also going to be there.  Lydia, Elias, and I set out on a tuk-tuk to find Jiam’s house while the boys napped.

            Walking into Jiam’s house and seeing some of my closest Lao friends again after eight and a half years was like a dream.  It seemed like just yesterday that I’d said goodbye. We were soon catching up on everything about each other. Sister Jiam had prepared an amazing feast of delicious Lao food, and we got to meet her husband and daughter.  While at her home she had a special ceremony for us called a Bacci ceremony.  These are usually done at a big and important occasion to wish blessing on people.  They are a way to commemorate the occasion, show hospitality, and bring honor and blessing.  There is a very high folk Buddhist religious element to it.  Usually there is a monk present who intones the blessing, and then everyone ties strings around each other’s wrists as they wish a blessing.  Jiam knows that we are Christians, and so she respectfully didn’t include the religious elements of the ceremony.  Instead, they said a blessing that they wished for us, and then we all exchanged gifts.  A combination of a Lao cultural tradition with Christmas. 

Me and my Lao sisters, reunited after eight and a half years! I forgot how tall I am in Laos.

Weung was a big hit with the kids. 

We tried to get a picture of all the kids around this beautiful ceremony centerpiece, but it just wasn't happening! Can you spot all four kids?

Combination Bacci and Christmas ceremony.

Weung and Lydia.

The beautiful centerpiece surrounded by fruit and candy that we shared together.

            Finally as evening came and the kids grew tired we said goodbye again.  Jiam went above and beyond to make sure that our time at her home was memorable, relaxed, and enjoyable.  Throughout our time in Vientiane she would stop by our guesthouse to drop off snacks for the kids.  She was a gracious and generous host, despite her own busyness.  In Laos, they don’t celebrate Christmas and so there is no Christmas holiday—a fact I’d forgotten when we booked our trip! So most of our friends were still working during the day, and only had evenings off. 

            That evening, after the kids were in bed, I went out on my first exploration into the night market.  It was completely changed. The road along the Mekong was packed with sellers, but most of them weren’t selling handicrafts, so after walking through, I didn’t end up buying anything.  Each night after the kids were in bed, Jeff stayed behind to watch them while I walked the streets, trying different street food, bringing some back for Jeff to try, and while I peeked into various shops.  The street food in Vientiane is so good, and smoothie shops and coconut ice cream abound. 

             The next day we set off on our next adventure—traveling with our friend Lang out to her organic farm about an hour outside of Vientiane, where Jeff was going to do some teaching for the staff.  We piled into the car and prepared for a long car ride.  The ride took us out past the road leading to Dong Dok University—where I used to teach.  The traffic in Vientiane has definitely increased in the last eight years, but once we got out of the city there wasn’t as much traffic.  Finally, we stopped in front of a lovely open air organic farm and restaurant that Lang, her husband, and staff were preparing to open.  There was a small swingset, some dogs, and some other children, so after an initially rough start with some biting red ants in the sand, the kids were set and happily entertained. The toughest part was keeping tabs on Titus and keeping him entertained.

Trying out raw sugar cane for the first time.

Lunch at the organic farm and restuarant.

Jeff teaching.  

Playing with the dogs in the sand.  We washed our hands well before lunch.

Kids played out on the swingset and in the sand.

With our friend Lang.  

The whole group at the organic farm and restuarant.

Jeff taught a morning session, and then we had a lunch that they prepared for us as a trial run.  It was delicious.  The salad featured some of the largest and tastiest avocados I’d ever seen.  There was fried rice and fried morning glory, a food that you have to have when you’re in Laos.  After lunch, Jeff taught one more session and then we headed back into the city, loaded into the truck.  About halfway back, we had our second panic moment of the trip when we realized I’d left my purse at the restaurant.  In the purse were my wallet with all of our Lao money, as well as my phone with the contact info for our friend! My Lao was so rusty still, and the person driving us back to Vientiane didn’t speak English.  Thankfully I somehow managed to communicate to him that we needed to stop at a money exchange to exchange some of our USD into Lao kip.  We were racing against the clock as most of the places close at 5 PM and it was getting very close to that hour.  Thankfully, our driver spotted an exchange place along the road that was still open, and I was able to get a good rate on our USD.  We were relieved to again be able to buy dinner that night, and to see God’s provision and care for us! Jeff was returning the next day to continue teaching, so he’d be able to get my purse back, then. 

            That night we took a trip down memory lane and walked over to eat at an Indian restaurant that my team and I had often frequented on Sunday nights.  Sure enough, it was still open! We enjoyed delicious Indian food and then went back to collapse in bed.  We were all dusty and tired, and Titus still wasn’t eating much solid food at that point besides yogurt.  He pretty much subsisted on yogurt and fruit shakes our entire trip. 

            The next day Jeff went off again to teach, and the kids and I had a day to explore by ourselves.  We started by trying to walk down to look at the river, using the double stroller.  But I quickly realized that it wouldn’t be a good idea to attempt that on my own.  They had built up the river bank so much that in order to get to the river you have to walk down a steep embankment and across sand for what looked like almost half a mile in order to get to Mekong.  It was hot, and I didn’t want to attempt that kind of trip (especially with a stroller and all three kids) on my own.  So we crossed back over onto the streets and visited the CAMA craft shop, which was on my list of places to see.  We got some souvenirs, the kids each tasted some mulberry tea and got some mulberry chapstick, and then we went to the place that was probably the top hit for the kids in Vientiane.  It is a small café that I would highly recommend called, “Common Grounds.” The food is delicious, and in the back is a non-airconditioned, but covered and enclosed play area for kids with slides, play houses, and toys.  Parents can sit outside to eat and watch their kids or just inside the restaurant and look out through the glass windows.  We got some fruit shakes and food and the kids had a great time playing. 

Trying Mulberry tea at the CAMA craft shop.

Playing at the Common Grounds cafe.

Free Christmas cookies!

          We headed back to the guesthouse at nap time, and then after a nap Jiam picked us up and brought us to her house for a swim on the roof of her condo and grilled fish and steak for dinner.  Jeff met us there when he was back from teaching.  So, Christmas Eve 2019 we spent with Jiam and her family.

Christmas Eve dinner at Jiam's house.

            Christmas Day didn’t go entirely as planned.  We started out by visiting Patuxai, the famous monument that stands in the middle of the city and is a landmark that even our kids had become familiar with by this time.  There’s nothing too special about it, although you can climb to the top after wading through many vendors selling souvenirs, and you can get a great view of the city.  We made it all the way to the top and we all survived. (Some ice cream ahead of time helped).  But Elias wasn’t feeling good, and we realized that he had a fever.  I’d hoped to go to the Lao church again for Christmas Day services, but both Elias and Jeff weren’t feeling well, so we ended up going back to the guesthouse to rest.

At the bottom of Patuxai after our ice cream.

We made it to the top!

            We were supposed to go out to Dong Dok to eat dinner with my friend Vath and her family, but with Jeff and Elias sick we decided that just Titus, Lydia, and I would go.  I couldn’t cancel on my friend who’d prepared all the food, and there wouldn’t be another opportunity to see her. 

            Thus began one of the crazier adventures that I did while we were there.  Lyd, Titus and I took a tuk tuk to the bus station to catch a bus out to the post office at Dong Dok.  There, my friend was going to be waiting for us to take us to her house.  We were supposed to catch the 4 PM bus, but we made it just as the bus was pulling out of the station.  Lao timetables are notoriously late, but of course, this bus left right on time! So then, we were stuck sitting on the next bus, waiting for it to leave at 4:30.  Of course this bus didn’t leave right on time.  Being stuck with Lydia wouldn’t have been too bad, but Titus was not in the sitting still stage, he just wanted to walk up and down the bus and get off the bus and not be contained.  After a mildly torturous hour long bus ride out to my friend’s house, we finally made it, thanks to lots of snacks and despite some screaming and walking up and down the aisle as the bus crept through the rush hour traffic.  We were the only foreigners on the bus, and made quite a scene with our blue eyes and Lydia’s blonde hair.  But Lyd was a good sport, and even Titus recovered by the time we got to my friend’s house, and there were some trucks to roll across the floor and other kids to play with. Most of my friend’s family does not speak English, but kids don’t really need to speak the same language in order to play together. 

Christmas Day dinner at Vath's house.

            My friend Vath had prepared another one of my favorite Lao foods, and she had gathered all her friends and family to eat with us.  She even had bought Christmas gifts for the kids.  She was so hospitable and generous.  We had a good time eating together, even though it was challenging trying to keep Titus from overturning or getting into the plates of food that were set on low tables on the floor, within perfect reach. 

            When it seemed like the kids were nearing the end of their ability to last any longer, another friend drove us back to the guesthouse in her car, thankfully.  The ride back took probably only about thirty minutes.  What a difference without rush hour traffic!

            Thursday was our last full day in Laos.  Our only plan for the day was to have dinner that night with my host family from long ago.  In the morning, we set out to see the Mekong.  This time, with Jeff with us, we were able to make the trek.  Jeff and Titus stayed up closer to the road, while Lyd, Elias and I made it all the way down to the river.  We touched the Mekong, threw some rocks in, and commemorated the trip with some pictures.  It was still beautiful, but so changed from all the development around it.

It was very bright.

Everyone was hot and tired after our hike.  Mango smoothies and fresh coconut hit the spot!

 We hiked back up to meet Jeff and Titus and got some smoothies to refresh us, before we went again to the craft shop.  For lunch we decided to journey to a Mexican restaurant we’d heard had a play area. We don’t get a lot of Mexican food in Jakarta, so we were excited to try it out.  We made it, and the food was pretty good and the kids enjoyed playing.  In the afternoon, Lyd and I went on an exploratory walk while the boys slept. We had a spur of the moment visit with my friend Tik, my first and beloved Lao teacher who really introduced me to both the Lao language and Laos, and was one of my first friends there.  It was great to catch up with her.  After that we got ready to meet my host family for dinner.

Titus playing at the Mexican restaurant play area.

Reunited with my first Lao teacher, Tik.

            Having dinner with my host family was definitely one of the highlights of the trip. Her home looked just like it had during the six weeks that I lived with them, but everyone had changed.  The little boys were now grown up and almost graduated from high school.  One of my host sisters was in college and the other was in high school.  These were the little kids that I’d played Uno and Dutch Blitz with, and who had taught me my colors and numbers in Lao! We chatted and ate, although our kids weren’t doing that well, so we didn’t end up getting to stay too long.  Meltdowns were occurring.  My host mom drove us back to our guesthouse for the last night. 

My host sister who was only a few years older than Lydia when I first met her, playing with my kids!

We tried to get a pic of all the kids...you can see the meltdowns...

Looking at old pictures with my host mom.

Our kids are on the verge of losing it.

The whole group.  What a wonderful reunion!

            On our final morning we enjoyed our last delicious breakfast at the guesthouse, and then took our final trip out to see the place where Jeff and I had gotten engaged.  We walked around for a little while before we needed to head back to the guesthouse to pack and get ready for the airport.  We took the kids to a final play session at Common Grounds and to pick up lunch there, and we went off to the airport. 

Visit to the park where we got engaged.

Final tuk tuk ride.

Reenactment photo taken by Lydia.

            It was hard to believe that a dream trip was over, but at the same time you can’t be in traveler mode forever, especially with three young kids.  Titus had slept terribly, getting up 4-5 times a night by the end of the trip, and so there was absolutely no way the trip could go on indefinitely; I needed some rest!  Hiking and tuk-tuking around the city with young kids and eating out at restaurants was exhausting, too. 

            We flew back to Bangkok and taxied to our final guesthouse, one that is run by the CMA.  It’s perfect for families because it’s a small compound with green space for the kids to run around as well as a small playground.  They had fun exploring, we got dinner, and then after the kids were in bed I went out on my final search for coconut ice cream.  I found some at a small night market nearby that I brought back.  The next day after breakfast we packed up and headed back to the airport for our return to Jakarta.  When we got back to Jakarta, the first thing I noticed was how green it was.  We are in the midst of rainy season, as opposed to the dry season in Bangkok and Vientiane. 

Last stop at the CMA guesthouse in Bangkok.

            It was good to feel like we were home, even though the trip was over.  It was nice to know we were coming back to friends and community, and I’d had my adventure cup filled for a while.  I liked seeing that even though the kids were young, they were starting to appreciate traveling and were starting to recognize and be exposed to many kinds of people and places in the world.  Most of all, I was thankful for the gift of getting to reconnect with precious friends in Laos.  I don’t know when we will be back, but I am almost certain that we will return again someday!